I am the writer/owner of ‘MA! motherhood with attitude.’ The artist/owner of our company, Tiffany, will add her two cents on this blog now and then, as well. Tiffany and I often talk about the struggle to earn a buck through our freelancing as we also try to make the ‘MA! dream’ come true. Our mission is to expose ‘perfect parenting propaganda’ for what it is: hogwash! We adore imperfect parents (and embrace the fact that we are among them.)Bars in the ER. Is it too much to ask?
So, we had one of those horrific visits to the ER on Sunday night. Blood, gore, screaming… I promise to tell the whole story, but my real question is this:
Why aren’t there bars in the pediatric units of emergency rooms?
I don’t care if it’s a cash bar. That seems reasonable in today’s health care world. But make the liquor immediately available to parents of children in pain. OR cough up some of those narcotics. You could wheel the bar into the room just like you wheel in the X-ray machine and the damned computer for all of your questions and reports. Wheel in the liquor cart. Not so difficult.
If you seriously want me to hold my child down while you inflict severe pain on her, then give me something to get through it, as well. Dammit.
So, here’s the story…
Allie CRUSHED her toe (to use the doctor’s words) with a bowling pin. (Yes, we had a bowling pin in our house. Long story.) The bleeding was instantaneous and her nail essentiall popped right off. She was screaming and shaking — going into shock — so Dave had to drive us all to the ER. (Couldn’t really leave Delaney at home, so we all ended up in the ER.) The pin basically split the skin of her toe in two but didn’t break the bone, thank goodness. If her toe was California, the gash was the San Andreas fault line.
So, she had to get three shots in her toe just to deaden it so that they could give her five stitches — three are UNDER her toenail — and then they had to sew the toenail back on. Yes, the kid had crushed her toe and as if that weren’t enough, they stuck three needles into it, including under the nail.
At one point, I was trying to hold her down and block her line of vision to her foot when the doc asked me to turn around and ‘look at something.’ (See how I’m bringing this back around to the alcohol part?) I looked and the man had Allie’s toenail in his hand. He then proceeded to say, “There are two lines of thought on what to do with the toenail. Leave it on or leave it off.” During this little tutorial, he proceeded to place the nail on her toe, which was surrounded by bloody cloths, and remove it. Put it on. Take it off. I barely remember saying, “Do what you think is best,” before turning back around to face my traumatized 6-year-old.
So, I hereby submit this suggestion to ER departments around the country — and I do believe it could be a significant money-maker — open up a bar in your pediatric unit. At the very LEAST, send a bottle of something home with Mom and Dad. We deserve it!
Yes, please. Maybe I should keep an emergency bottle of Mike-arita in the fridge for that purpose…
Comment by Maida — April 30, 2009 @ 9:52 amAmen, Sister!
Comment by Kim — April 30, 2009 @ 12:01 pmpoor Janalee – I winced and grimaced throughout this entire story – and now all I want is a Mike-arita!
Comment by kim — April 30, 2009 @ 12:03 pmBrilliant! Definitely think you’re on to something big!!!
Comment by C.B. — April 30, 2009 @ 12:07 pmPS. Embarrassed by my lack of sensitivity…so sorry about Allie!!!
Comment by C.B. — April 30, 2009 @ 12:08 pmOh Amen, my friend. Amen.
Comment by Hillary — April 30, 2009 @ 12:36 pmSorry about Allie’s toe, though. Ouch.
So… Did he really have to ask whether you thought putting the nail back on was a good idea? Um.. hello!! Pedicures!! She’s not going to be 6 forever.
Yes, no nail and keeping her toe is not a bad situation, but if you can save the nail then don’t ask!! Just do it! Doctors are really dense sometimes.
Jesus, can you just imagine your daughter having to buy closed toe shoes for the rest of her life because the doc didn’t put her toe nail back on. What a weirdo…
It’s a good thing he realized that sewing it back on was the better option.
I’ll a bloody mary, thank you.
Comment by Vanessa — April 30, 2009 @ 4:13 pmOOOUUUCCCHHH!
Poor Allie, hope she is feeling better. I saw the pictures you sent just before lunch “Thank You”! Made my sandwich go down a little rough…
That made my son’s broken arm (that looked like a wishbone) seem like a slight cough.
My question is “once you made it to the ER and were holding Allie down as the doctor is performing painful pin the toe-nail on the child”, you have not mentioned where Dave is? Question:
Comment by Devron — April 30, 2009 @ 4:34 pmDid Dave find the bar?
Did Dave pass out?
Did Dave sneek away with the prescription pad?
WHERE’S DAVE?
Find out next week 9pm central, FOX 31
Hey-I just sneak in my own hooch! The Powells are always prepared! Stick with us Dave!
Comment by Caren — April 30, 2009 @ 8:15 pmI totally agree with a bar in the ER! My 4-year old cut his finger with a knife and had to get stitches just a few weeks ago. It was horrifying. My brave mother took him to have them removed; I did not want to face that torture! Of course now when he is doing something that could hurt him we ask him if he wants stitches again. He immediately stops what he’s doing!
Comment by Allison — May 2, 2009 @ 10:05 pmOMG you poor things.
Griffin gashed his head open but not so bad we rushed to the hospital. We were leaving town and it stopped bleeding so we went, but then it reopened when he was having some fun.
I had to hold Griffin down while they put 6 needles into his head to numb it so they could stitch it. After waiting 4 hours…
My question is why don’t all ER’s go by order of importance/urgency. The one we went to didn’t!
Hope she’s better. My husband has half a toenail which is ugly, but when he had none it wasn’t that noticeable.
But the pedicure point is well taken. Hope Alli’s 100% soon!
Comment by Jenn — May 3, 2009 @ 6:57 pmI also think there should be a cocktail hour in the ped’s unit in the hospital. I swear, these hospitals just don’t think about the parents AT ALL. What’s up with that?
Sending healthy toe vibes to Alli!!
Comment by Shanyn — May 4, 2009 @ 10:13 amOn here for the hunt and am already sidetracked! I completely agree about a bar in the ER! My 20mo old DD was dehydrated from Gastroenteritis and they worked for 45 freakin minutes on trying to get an I.V. into her before giving up. And it was at 4 in the morning! Needless to say, they failed, admitted her, woke her up AGAIN, and tried for another half hour. My poor child has been scared of doctors and hospitals ever since!
I do hope your Allie isn’t scarred for life! Toe or mind!
Comment by Charleen — May 8, 2009 @ 8:54 pmSidetracked from the diaper hunt.
As a mom who had a 5-year-old taken by ambulance last Friday night, I wholeheartedly agree with your suggestion.
(He’s ok, by the way.)
Comment by Kristina B. — May 22, 2009 @ 1:45 pm